Waving the white flag.

A spiritual view point.

I'm tired.

I woke up today feeling tired, after a full night's rest, and 3 days of doing exactly nothing but resting, I'm still tired.

In fact, I'm SO tired today that yoga, meditation, and journaling didn't help lift my energy like they usually do.

There's a term for this: Soul Level Tired.

When I was walking my dog this morning, I actually asked myself, "Why am I so tired after all this rest?" and I had a flashback of a video I watched a few days ago where Jim Carrey was talking about how his mentor taught him that depression means DEEP REST. That deep rest is necessary to recover from realizing that you've been holding up this avatar of who you have been pretending to be. Here's a link.

What struck me was that this was the first time I stopped to ask myself why I am so tired. If you've worked with me any length of time, you already know my infamous phrase, "Right questions produce right answers."

If you don't ask the right question, you'll never get to the root cause of the issue.

It took some time this morning for me to finally break down into tears realizing that I too have been holding up this unreasonable avatar that I can no longer sustain. The exhaustion I'm feeling is my soul saying, "I can't do this anymore" and my physical body is reacting to that.

I'm tired of...

Always being there for people.Being the strong one.Showing up as the one who doesn't let go.Refusing to give up.Being resilient.Drawing on my own strength.Being courageous.Being the fighter.Working so hard.Being the healer.Doing what's right.

The list goes on.

I think it all boils down to, "The one who does it all, goes it alone and never asks for help."

That's the core avatar: The People Pleaser.

Which led me this concept of waving the white flag.

The People pleaser lives for others instead of themselves, yet they struggle with being of service to others because they find it exhausting.

What can we learn from this?

Where can we examine our own intentions? I want to offer some journaling prompts today, so you can work through this on your own:

• Does it GIVE me energy when I give to others? If not, why do I keep doing it?

• Have I been conditioned to sacrifice my own needs in service of others?

• Where have I cultivated an external environment and surroundings that perpetuate this need to sacrifice my own needs for others?

• If I was back to the first day of my life, with no conditioning whatsoever, what would I choose to do?

It may be no surprise to hear that people-pleasers struggle with the concept of having free will, because they've never really had it. They've always done what others expect of them, feeling confined and boxed in.

The truth is, there is another concept: Divine Will

Divine will is a deep trust in the consciousness that flows through everyone and everything as an intelligence that is guiding your life every day in every way.

What if the white flag is a metaphor for surrendering to spirit?

What if the color white is a symbol for allowing the light to come in and transmute your avatar for you while you deeply rest?

What if in waving the white flag, you are letting spirit know that you're aware that you've been holding up this image that isn't really you and you need help? This releases you from the need to figure out what to do next, and how.

Sometimes surrender looks a lot like giving up.

The Lesson

This may be controversial but here goes.

If you don't want to help others, and it doesn't nourish you, don't do it.

I feel deep within my soul that at least some recovering people pleasers are here to learn how to create more fun and joy in their OWN lives and the lesson here is to be ok with serving your own needs in this lifetime.

What if serving your own needs automatically helps others because you are showing them how to nourish themselves without directly involving yourself in their transformation?

Just try to steer clear of turning into the lawn mower and plowing down anyone who gets in your way. This is a shadow energy that needs to be healed.

Consider this note today a little nudge that it's OK and you are free to live your life on your terms.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on today’s tale.

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